DumbScams - Ridiculous E-Mails

Loans for the needy?

dalkoyo — Sun, 02 Jan 2011 16:49:53 +0000

Loans for the needy? I seriously doubt this. Look at the misspelling in the email address. Why would you contact a person at this group to verify this is a scam or not?

Attention Applicant:

We welcome you to GUARANTEED TRUST LOAN FIRM is our duty offering to those helping the needy to gain financial stability in order to meet with up with present economic melt down and the demands of the money you need. We offer loan to all categories of seekers or for personal usage.

We give out loan at 3% interest rate, our minimum offer is 5,000 USD to 100,000,000,USD, We can also disburse your loan to you in any currency of your
choice. We can offer an urgent loan at any time to your needs.

[ PLEASE NOTES:- THAT GUARANTEED TRUST LOAN FIRM IS NOT INTERESTED IN ANY SCAM AND THIS IS A GUARANTEED TRUST LOAN FIRM AND FOR MORE INFORMATION PLEASE CONTACT OFFICER IN CHARGE OF APPLICANT DETAILS:

GUARANTEED TRUST LOAN FIRM"]

E-mail:guarntd_lonfirm.service@zbavitu.net

We would appreciate your utmost co-operation to this email so we both can make this transaction a successful one. Hope to hear from you soonest.

As Your Satisfaction and Financial Success.

Warmest Regards,

Mr Alan Johnson

Asking for Bibles…or a way to continue a scam?

dalkoyo — Fri, 03 Dec 2010 13:11:12 +0000

I’m not really sure what to think about this. It is hard to determine if it is sincere or a way to get a communication line open to continue a scam…

Dear Friend in Christ,
Calvary greetings in Jesus name. I pray that this message meet you well in Christ. Hope you are not surprised at this message.
I am writing you from Edo, Nigeria. By His grace I’m a Christian watched by His blood and serving our Lord Jesus Christ. I am not perfect in any way but strive unto perfection. I am blessed with a wife and three children with five grand children. We fellowship in a small community church with about 40 members. I teach in the adult Sunday class. We are blessed with a devoted young pastor.

Now unto why I wrote. Bibles are not easy to come by where I live because they are imported for sale here. Me and my wife own a very old tiny print bible. We need bibles with super giant print. We need your help for bibles with super giant print King James Version. We would also need three of such bibles for some aged mothers who cannot afford them in our church. I am appealing that you send us 5 super giant print bibles in English language. My postal address is P.O. Box 4186, Benin City, Edo State, Nigeria. If you send them post office mail insured we will receive them. I will write you when I get the bibles and please you can add a prayer request. We may have nothing else to offer but as we pray God will intervene in whatever challenges you may have there. I do not come to the email often so may not write but when the bibles reaches me I will write. Please pray for the challenges in our country especially for the poor and hungry. It is always very hard for the very poor but we have to trust that God is allowing what must happen so that men will seek Him.

Ephesians 3:20, 21 “Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us, 21-Unto him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. Amen. God bless you.
Matthew Fred
P.O. Box 4186,
Benin City, Edo State,
Nigeria
What do my readers think about this???

They are back and hitting other email! Thanks to West Africa

dalkoyo — Wed, 10 Nov 2010 13:16:32 +0000

More Fun:

Mr.ALIHU UMAR
BANK OF AFRICA(B.O.A)
OUAGADOUGOU BURKINA-FASO,
WEST AFRICA.

Dear Friend,

I know that this message will come to you as a surprise. I AM A SECRETARY OF FOREIGN REMITTANCE DIRECTOR BOA BANK HERE IN OUAGADOUGOU BURKINA FASO. I Hope that you will not expose or betray this trust and confident that i am about to repose on you for the mutual benefit of our both families.

I need your urgent assistance in transferring the sum of ($7.6)million to your account within 14 banking days. This money has been dormant for years in our Bank without claim. I want the bank to release the money to you as the nearest person to our deceased customer, the owner of the account died along with his supposed next of kin in an air crash since July 31st
2000.

I don’t want the money to go into our Bank treasurer as an abandoned fund. So this is the reason why i contacted you so that the bank can release the money to you as the next of kin to the deceased customer. Please I would like you to keep this proposal as a top secret and delete it if you are not interested.

Upon receipt of your reply to, i will give you full details on how the business will be executed and also note that you will have 45% of the above mentioned sum if you agree to handle this business with me.

Best Regard.
ALIHU UMAR

It been some time, but it still goes on!

dalkoyo — Tue, 09 Nov 2010 03:18:55 +0000

It’s been some time since the games, but here they are again …

Good Day,

I am a Senior Auditor working with a Bank here in
Malaysia,I have a deal of $9.7m are you in interest to
receive this fund into your Bank Account or your open up a
new Bank Account to receive the usd$9.7m and we share
50/50% after you have receive sum into your bank account.

The $9.7m left behind by a late customer, a Iraq citizen
Mr Mohamat H Ammar who died with his entire family in Iraq
War before it is declared unserviceable by my Bank.

Firstly, I will like to clearly make you understand,that
is legally, you have nothing to worry about, as far as
this inheritance claim is concerned.As a banker with Twenty years of
experience,I make bold to say with full authority,that this business is
100% legal, and safe.Can we use this opportunity and make
money together as we all need money. I have decided to
remit this sum following my idea that we have a
deal/agreement and I am going to do this legally.Please
let us have this deal done.

MY CONDITIONS.

1. You will give me 50% of the total contract funds as
soon as you confirm it in your designated bank account.

2. This deal must be kept secret forever, and all
correspondence will be strictly by email / telephone, for
security purposes.

3. There should be no third parties as most problem
associated with your fund release are caused by your
agents or representative.

If you AGREE with my conditions, l advise you on what to
do immediately and the transfer will commence without
delay as I will proceed to fix your name on the Payment
schedule instantly to meet the three days mandate by my
bank. I hope you don’t reject this offer and have the
funds transferred. Reply to my Alternative Email
(saviorwinna@contractor.net).

Waiting for your reply soon.

Yours Sincerely.

Mr Savior P.winna
The information in this message and in any attachments,
contains confidential
information and is intended solely for the attention and
use of the addressee
(s).

I thought nobody loved me anymore…and then I get this!

dalkoyo — Sat, 10 Apr 2010 17:06:22 +0000

A whole new day. Another e-mail scam this time with ties to the beloved Microsoft. Now I am happy that someone out there loves me still and wants the best for me…NOT!

Your e-mail address has won you the sum of Ј50,000.00 from the MICROSOFTINTERNATIONAL LOTTERY.

For your payment. CONTACT PERSON:

Mr. Terry Martins
Email: mswxmas002@rcweb.net
Tel: +234-802-897-3528

INFORMATION REQUESTED:

(a) Your full Name:
(b) Contact address:
(c) Your Telephone and fax numbers:
(d) Your Age:
(e) Your occupation:
(f) Your country of origin:

Please note: This e-mail was sent from a notification-only address that cannot accept incoming e-mail. Please do not reply to this message except the verification manager

Mr.Terry Martins’s—— Email: mswxmas002@rcweb.net

Yours in service.
Microsoft Award Team
MICROSOFT AWARD TEAM COPYRIGHT © 2010 ALL RIGHT RESERVED

Now I am happy……. Yeah Right…

Ding Dong…Africa calling…again

dalkoyo — Sat, 19 Sep 2009 16:36:55 +0000

Here we go again…more fun junk from Nigeria… Any way who the H*** is Dear ? I’m not YOUR Dear anything!!

ATTENTION DEAR,

THE MANAGEMENT OF CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA PLC, WISHES TO INFORM YOU THAT WE ARE IN RECEIPT OF YOUR CONFIRMED BANK DRAFT CHEQUE ISSUED IN YOUR FAVOUR WITH CASH AMOUNT OF ONE MILLION FIVE HUNDRED US DOLLARS, FROM YOUR AGENT AND HE TOLD US TO ARRANGE YOUR PAYMENT TO BE AVAILABLE BY WESTERN UNION DUE TO THE FACT THAT YOU CAN NOT BE ABLE TO CASH THE TOTAL $1.5MILLION CHEQUE,

YOU ARE NOW ADVISED TO CONTACT WESTERN UNION OFFICE IMMEDIATELY AND SEND THEM YOUR DETAILS WHERE THEY CAN START SENDING YOUR PAYMENT TO YOU AS WE BOOKED WITH WESTERN UNION OFFICE TO START REMITTING YOUR PAYMENT RIGHT FROM TOMORROW IF POSSIBLE YOU CONTACT THEM AS TODAY: THE AMOUNT THEY WILL SEND YOU EVERY DAY IS $5000.00 US Dollars .TILL YOU RECEIVE THE TOTAL AMOUNT OF YOUR $1.500.000.00 CHEQUE.

HOWEVER YOU ARE ADVISED TO CONTACT THE DIRECTOR OF WESTERN UNION OFFICE.

CONTACT PERSON: MR WILLIAMS WALTER
EMAIL:walterherbert77@live.com
Phone+ 234-8022394674

SO BEFORE THEY CAN PROCEED ON YOUR PAYMENT BY TOMORROW YOU ARE ADVISED TO EFFECT THE SUM OF $185US DOLLARS TO THEM TO ENABLE THEM REVENUE THE CHEQUE AND START SENDING IT TO YOU IMMEDIATELY TOMORROW. BELOW IS THE INFORMATION REQUESTED.

RECEIVER NAME……….
CITY…………………………
COUNTRY………………….
GENDER……………………
TELEPHONE………………
QUESTION TEST…………
ANSWER…………………..

THE DIRECTOR OF WESTERN UNION MR WILLIAMS WALTER WILL EMAIL YOU WITH THE TRACKING DETAILS YOU NEED TO PICK YOUR A DAY PAYMENT OVER THERE. THE WESTERN UNION OFFICE IS NOW WAITING FOR YOUR DETAILS WHERE THEY CAN START SENDING YOUR A DAY PAYMENT FROM TOMORROW.

THANKS FOR YOUR COOPERATION.
YOURS FAITHFUlLLY
MR GREGORY ROBERT.

Grants? I don’t think that this is really going to help…

dalkoyo — Tue, 15 Sep 2009 15:51:47 +0000

I have been following this ‘grants’ thing for quite some time from different sources, and today was the final straw because of the ‘fine’ print (even if it is at the top of the page). I am getting VERY tired of this stuff even if it is not a ‘scam’ as they claim. If you don’t take action in 7 days you are going to find a scary reduction on your credit card if you don’t. Now mind you, if you don’t have a credit card (because of the financial state you are in) surely that ‘last Ramon noodle meal’ as one testimony states will most likely be your last. We really need to look for sources that are truly FREE and not just to line someone elses’ pocket Read this fine print below to see what I mean

Terms, Disclosures, and Electronic Signature Information. xxx authorization to provide and bill its services is obtained by way of your electronic signature. Once submitted, this electronic order constitutes an electronic letter of agency. xxx reliance on your electronic signature, as obtained above, is done pursuant to the Uniform Electronic Transactions Act and the electronic Signatures in Global and National Transactions Act. Both laws specifically preempt State laws that recognize only paper records or handwritten signatures. By submitting this form, I am ordering the yyyy and trial membership for $2.29 S&H. After the 7 day trial, I will be charged $39.95 a month thereafter if I do not cancel. I also agree to the 14 day and 21 day bonus trials to the zzzz and zzzz for $19.95 a and $9.95 a month thereafter, should I choose not to cancel. I have read and agree to the Privacy Policy | Terms & Conditions. For questions, call 1234 , anytime, 24 hours a day.

I have removed the company name, program, and phone number. But, I think you get the idea here. While these are not scams (perhaps) we really need to take a close look before we get deeper into the problems we have.

More fun from Africa!!!

dalkoyo — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 16:11:04 +0000

More from Africa – Just think I can now retire and help my family during these harsh economic times all becuse if the generosity of Marcelin Patterson! Now they are using Direct Matches a legitimate business social networking site to to their ‘dirty deeds’. By the way, I do have the legitimate link to Direct Matches if you want to form a real honest business network at: My Direct Matches site check it out for REAL HONEST networking.

-**-

From:Miss Marcelin Patterson
Abidjan,Cote d’ivoire.

Dear One,
l am introducing myself,l am Miss Marcelin Patterson, the only Daughter of late Chief and Mrs. Patterson, I wish to request for your assistance in a financial transaction,l got your contact through this site directmatches and I want to invest in Manufacturing and real estate management in your country.

I have Fifteen million Five hundred thousand united states dollars.USD($15,500,000) to invest in your country, and I will require your assistance in investing this funds in a profitable venture in your country.l will compensate you with 20% for your efforts in assisting me.

Now permit me to ask these few questions: -

1. Can I completely trust you?
2. Promise not to sit on my money when reaches your country?

Consider this and get back to me immediately through this my private box for further explanation and conversation on how we will proceed. Awaiting your immediate response. Thanks and God bless.

Best Regards

My dad’s farm burned…so now I burn YOU!

dalkoyo — Tue, 20 Jan 2009 16:42:02 +0000

Some how the farm got burned and there is still so much money left…MMMMM maybe I can scam the world and make some more. Burn baby burn as they say!

From William Kablan. [On behalf of the family]
122 NELSON MANDELA SQUARE,
SANTON JOHANESBURG
SOUTH AFRICA
+27 737 654 987

Please reply with this EMAIL: william11kablan@gmail.com
Dear Friend,
Having obtained your contact from the internet that you deserve trust,
coupled with my deep interest to invest in your country, I decided to
contact and solicit your Mutual assistance at all cost.
Please accept my apology if this e-mail is embarrassing you as you
don’t know me. My Mother and I are in need of urgent assistance. I am Mr.
William Kablan, the only son Of Sir, David Kablan of Zimbabwe. During
the current crises against farmers in Zimbabwe and from the support of
our president ROBERT MUGABE to claim all the white Owned Farms in our
country.
All the white farmers where ordered to surrender their farms to his
party members, My Father who was one of the best farmers in our country
did not support his idea, And So the party members invaded my father’s
farms and burnt everything in the farm, and My father was beaten up by
this evil men and made away with a lot of properties in My father’s farm
company and the tension was so much on him he was rushed to a SPECIALIT
HOSPITAL in South Africa along with me and my mother, we moved out of
Zimbabwe because our lives were in danger, and after much distress my
beloved father Died here in South Africa.
But before then, my father handed over to my mother a proof of deposit
Slip/Agreement and some documents which were made between him and
SECURITY COMPANY PTY LTD here in South Africa on which he deposited the sum
OF $26M (TWENTY SIX MILLION UNITED STATES OF AMERICA DOLLAR.
This money was raised by his farmer’s group for the purchasing of
farming Equipments/machineries before the land dispute Rose. So we decided
to make contact With an overseas person, who will assist us to transfer
this money out of South Africa, we want to be there in your country.
We’re here as refugee and our status doesn’t allow us to stand for the
fund for transfer, I want you to stand as my Father’s beneficiary with
the help of my father’s friend who is a banker here for Fast and easy
movement.
Note that for your time and help, 25% of this fund is yours and 5% of
the fund is for any expenses that will be incurred both locally and
internationally in the Course of this transfer and the remaining 70% is for
my family to start up a Business in your country with your support.
We’re expecting to hear from you as soon
As possible for more details.
THANKS AND GOD BLESS YOU
William Kablan. [On behalf of the family]
Please reply with this EMAIL: william11kablan@gmail.com

$500000 delivered by FEDEX! Of Course from West Africa

dalkoyo — Mon, 01 Dec 2008 19:07:20 +0000

Greetings To You

I have been waiting for you to contact me for your Confirmable Bank
 Draft of $500,000.00 United States Dollars, but I
did not hear from you since that time. Then I went and deposited the
 Draft with FEDEX COURIER SERVICE, West Africa, I travelled out of the
 country for a 3 Months Course and I will not come back till end of
 November.

What you have to do now is to contact the FEDEX COURIER SERVICE as soon
 as possible to know when they will deliver your
package to you because of the expiring date. For your information, I
 have paid for the delivering Charge, Insurance premium and Clearance
 Certificate Fee of the Cheque showing that it is not a Drug Money or meant
 to sponsor Terrorist
attack in your Country except the security keeping fees which will be
 paid by you.

The only money you will send to the FEDEX COURIER SERVICE to deliver
 your Draft direct to your postal Address in your
country is ($90 USD) Dollars only being Security Keeping Fee of the
 Courier Company so far.

I have to let you pay this yourself because i dont know when you will
 contact them and in case of demurrage. You have to contact the FEDEX
 COURIER SERVICE now for the delivery of your Draft with this information
 bellow:

FedEx Contact Person :: Mr. Lance Fisher
Email : fedexcourier3@sbcglobal.net
Phone number: +234-802-738-3331 

Finally, make sure that you reconfirm :

1. Full Name:
2. Full Address:
3. Occupation:
4. Age:
5. Sex:
6. Telephone Number:
7. Nationality:
8. Place of Residence: 

To avoid any mistake on the Delivery. And ask them to give you the
 tracking number after payment to enable you track
your package over there and know when it will get to your address. Let
 me repeat again, try to contact them as soon as
you receive this mail to avoid any further delay and remember to pay
 them their Security Keeping fee of $90 US Dollars for their immediate
 action.

You should also let me know through email as soon as you receive your
 Draft.

Sincerely,
Mrs. Kate Williams
Former Director Presidential Library & Museum
International Online Lottery Co-ordinator.© 2008